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prejudices against the handicapped
I never ask for this nor do I want it. Quiet frankly MS sucks!!!! I do not have self pity because I am sick nor do I want yours.which is why I don't tell people I have it. ok well I guess I just did.But this is the first time I am admitting it to anyone. Hell I have really just admitted it to myself. It is real and it is incurable. There I said it and now own my illness. I hate the pity, stares, and stigma that comes with having MS. Pray for us, help us, love us, appreciate us, and help us find the cure we have been waiting so long for. For we have the strength to stand together and fight for our lives. For those of you who are curious what my daily life is like here is a link to help you understand. OK the optic neuritis is like this when I have a flare up, but it does effect my daily life for my vision sucked to begin with.
http://www.ms-gateway.com/understanding-ms/ms-simulator-53.htm
OK here is another link it ticked me off so bad that I wrote to Kennedy and Kerry. There is no reason for this to have ever happened had the cop just listened to her. Are you kidding me I see law suit and Rodney King all at the same time. This is the kind of thing that gets me going. She looks so good she cannot be sick. really well I look so good and I'm sick. This is the new millennium when will we stop judging people by how they look on the outside, before we get to know what is on the inside. Let me know your thoughts on this.
http://www.abc40tv.com/global/video/popup/pop_playerLaunch.asp?vt1=... with MS Says State Police Used Excessive Force in Front of Son During Traffic Stop
Thanks for your time,and enjoy the writing below.
Who are the people with Multiple Sclerosis?
We are your parents, your children, your brothers and sisters; we are the person down the street; we are that lady or fellow who may walk a little "funny" at the grocery store. We are the people that you "tsk, tsk" over because we might look "too good" to use a handicapped parking space. We are the folks who may not be able to get out to the Church or Temple every weekend; we are your peers; we are human beings.
We are the face of Multiple Sclerosis. A face that is nearly every ethnicity; that comes from nearly every country, that does not discriminate by social standing or class or financial or educational background or language or religion. We are both able to walk unassisted and use canes and walkers and wheelchair users; we jog and swim and partake in sports; we are housebound, we use scooters; we need respirators. We are everything in between. We are visually impaired and we are not. We are at every level of physical ability.
Of course, we "look so good" while we're doing it. We hear that phrase every day of our lives. Sometimes that phrase is meant as a compliment and sometimes it is meant to hurt or meant to shame us into doing something of which we may not be currently capable. We may be able to do that something tomorrow, though, or next week; Multiple Sclerosis is like that. We are like that.
Some of us are hearing impaired; yet all of us occasionally have people talk louder to us. "HOW ARE YOU D-O-I-N-G????" they'll scream, speaking to us as though we were either hearing or intellectually impaired. "YOU LOOK SO G-O-O-D!!!!"
Of course we do. Thank you very much. We are, in fact, the very best looking people in the handicapped community. We have secret beauty pageants every year, to decide which of our number is the absolute best-looking. Billy Crystal emcees, as his character Fernando; "...and you look MARVELOUS my dear; absolutely M-A-R-V-E-L-O-U-S..."
We are brave. We are fragile. We want to live, and we want to end it all. We look for support and we want to stand alone. We are Every person. We are the People with Multiple Sclerosis. We are People, Just Like You....
http://www.ms-gateway.com/understanding-ms/ms-simulator-53.htm
OK here is another link it ticked me off so bad that I wrote to Kennedy and Kerry. There is no reason for this to have ever happened had the cop just listened to her. Are you kidding me I see law suit and Rodney King all at the same time. This is the kind of thing that gets me going. She looks so good she cannot be sick. really well I look so good and I'm sick. This is the new millennium when will we stop judging people by how they look on the outside, before we get to know what is on the inside. Let me know your thoughts on this.
http://www.abc40tv.com/global/video/popup/pop_playerLaunch.asp?vt1=... with MS Says State Police Used Excessive Force in Front of Son During Traffic Stop
Thanks for your time,and enjoy the writing below.
Who are the people with Multiple Sclerosis?
We are your parents, your children, your brothers and sisters; we are the person down the street; we are that lady or fellow who may walk a little "funny" at the grocery store. We are the people that you "tsk, tsk" over because we might look "too good" to use a handicapped parking space. We are the folks who may not be able to get out to the Church or Temple every weekend; we are your peers; we are human beings.
We are the face of Multiple Sclerosis. A face that is nearly every ethnicity; that comes from nearly every country, that does not discriminate by social standing or class or financial or educational background or language or religion. We are both able to walk unassisted and use canes and walkers and wheelchair users; we jog and swim and partake in sports; we are housebound, we use scooters; we need respirators. We are everything in between. We are visually impaired and we are not. We are at every level of physical ability.
Of course, we "look so good" while we're doing it. We hear that phrase every day of our lives. Sometimes that phrase is meant as a compliment and sometimes it is meant to hurt or meant to shame us into doing something of which we may not be currently capable. We may be able to do that something tomorrow, though, or next week; Multiple Sclerosis is like that. We are like that.
Some of us are hearing impaired; yet all of us occasionally have people talk louder to us. "HOW ARE YOU D-O-I-N-G????" they'll scream, speaking to us as though we were either hearing or intellectually impaired. "YOU LOOK SO G-O-O-D!!!!"
Of course we do. Thank you very much. We are, in fact, the very best looking people in the handicapped community. We have secret beauty pageants every year, to decide which of our number is the absolute best-looking. Billy Crystal emcees, as his character Fernando; "...and you look MARVELOUS my dear; absolutely M-A-R-V-E-L-O-U-S..."
We are brave. We are fragile. We want to live, and we want to end it all. We look for support and we want to stand alone. We are Every person. We are the People with Multiple Sclerosis. We are People, Just Like You....
Views: 27
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by SoloPocono on -
hi again Jada ;) Actually, I think YOU are a MUCH stronger woman than I. I honestly don't think I could have dealt with what I have, had it happened 20 or even 15yrs ago. I also identify with you and Craig. I'm dealing with agoraphobia right now, and WAS dealing with the most severe depression I could have imagined. And yes, I went so far as to attempt to take my life...See, the year that Chris died and I was diagnosed with cancer, we had also lost a baby at 22 weeks, PLUS I went through menopause almost overnight. Needless to say, coupled with a past history of PTSD as well as having no support except for my children...it came to a head, I couldn't take it anymore and didn't want to put my children through it.
Somehow, I not only lived through a months worth of oxycodone, fentanyl, and other misc meds, I never even went to the hospital-woke up 2 days later with a dislocated hip and a knocked out tooth!! My docs didn't know until a few months ago that that was what happened-considering falls/tripping are pretty normal, everyday things for me.. ;)
About 15 yrs ago, my ex-husband and I helped to put a web page and support group together for people with NPS. Unfortunately, I'm no longer active in the group. During m lowest point of depression, my ex took it upon himself to tell the group that I was lying about Chris's death, the baby and the cancer. Although most of the people knew better-and one actually was the only one to ever visit me, (She didn't live far from Philly-where I went for the surgeries), my depression got the best of me and I just never rejoined the group. Last I checked, they were averaging over 70 emails/day...I find it hard just to keep up with my limited amt now. We'll see though. A former employer/friend JUST got me a copy of her site-licensed Dragon Naturally Speaking. We're justifying it because I DO still help her out with things from time to time. I JUST installed it last night, so it was kind of neat you mentioned it. I've only begun to "train" it though, and it's not adapting real well to my voice for some reason, (probably the cheapo mic I have...am hoping I can afford a decent headset in 2-3 weeks.
And Craig-so would I. It was actually working with Vets, mostly Nam, as well as my Vietnamese "foster sister" that got me to double major in micro/psych, and do my clinicals at the VA in Gainesville, FL. Since then I volunteered in several organizations specifically working with Nam Vets. Even my own situation pales in comparison to what you guys have been through, and continue to go through.
Well, tis WAAY past my bedtime and I have an early appt. tomorrow. Say a prayer for me please-I'm going for an ultrasound because of what they saw in my mammo on Monday...
heehee, so much for giving up doctors for Lent..... ;)
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Permalink Reply by Jada L. on -
I am very glad you are still with us. It is important to always remember that no matter how hard life gets, that tomorrow is another day. Not to mention suicide will not end your suffering, and will cause more pain to those you leave behind. It is very hard to be disabled with any illness weather it be mental, physical or both. It chose us, and it is what it is. There are lessons to learn from it. I don't know what they are yet, but they are there. Hope that you will get back in with your support group or find another one, because I think it will help you out tremendously. I know it has for me. I am so glad I joined patients like me. It is the best thing I could have done for myself, and the people there are awesome. Maybe they have a group for your condition. God bless you
Jada
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Permalink Reply by bob3160 on -
I just got finished with jury duty where we awarded a woman $60,000.00 because a cop couldn't wait for an answer to the question he posed to her. Instead he handcuffed her, threw her into a squad car and then locked her up with actual felons.
This woman never even had so much as a traffic ticket.
Thank God, this is the exception to the rule.
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Permalink Reply by michael mooney on -
I know how it is, I am a disabled army desert storm veteran.
PTSD
major depression
brain damage from extreme heat stroke 110 deg body temp.
complete physical and nervous breakdown during the war.
diabetic
heart attack 3/17/08
have panic attacks if I go too far from home.
I used to have a photographic memory,
I still do theres just no film in the camera.
with gods help I just keep going.
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Permalink Reply by Jada L. on
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Good god Michael what in the hell did the military do to you. I think that is aweful to take a vibrant healthy young man and turn him into a disabled person. I am so sorry you had to endure that. You are in my prayers. I hope you at least get military disability benefits, and that they are at least enough for you to get by on. God bless you and thank you for the service you did for our country.
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Permalink Reply by michael mooney on
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God bless you too.
I get SSDI and VA disability, I get by.
now if william d ford thinks im paying the 30,000+
I have in student loans, their nuts.
God willing I keep going.
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Permalink Reply by Jada L. on
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i thought the military is supposed to take care of your college loans. Is there a stipulation that they don't tell us about?
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Permalink Reply by SoloPocono on
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Michael, you can also file for a "forgiveness". Contact the State in which you got your loan-their Dept. of Education has a division to deal with these things. I originally had about 40K in loans, I paid all but $3K-which was actually "interest" that had accumulated. (I was blessed in a way, that when I returned to school to finish my degree, I was a single mom with 3 children; already had years of experience in the medical field; and qualified for lots of scholarship money; otherwise, 2 yrs undergrad, 18months to a Masters and 2yrs of Med School could have wiped me out) My Dad had retired from the Florida DOE and knew who I needed to contact once my physical challenges became such that I just couldn't continue paying $100-which was STILL gathering interest!! Also-once your loans are forgiven, it's like starting anew if you ever wanted to return to take classes. About a year and a half ago, I'd developed an interest in philosophy and actually got a grant to take some local courses on a non-degree seeking student. Unfortunately, they've closed down that satellite campus, otherwise, I may have continued to take classes-just because I LOVE learning. ;)
Good Luck and "keep on keeping on" as a song my daughter used to sing said!!
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Permalink Reply by michael mooney on
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Update:its up to 32,000 now 1/1/2011
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Permalink Reply by michael mooney on
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heart attack 10/12 fourth angiogram and fifth stent.
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Permalink Reply by Christopher Kelly on -
Well written, Virginia and great responses below. I have Cerebral Palsy and use a scooter so my disability is quite visible. I freely admit that as search for open accessible parking spots I have muttered oaths at people walking to cars in those spots. I have friends with MS and other "hidden" disabilities like asthma, arthritis, etc., and I know better than to assume. But, I also know of perfectly able people who use "grandma's" parking placard, or whatever, because they "deserve to use it" for driving grandma around or whatever. Seriously. So, you never know when you see someone walking to/from the car. But, I try to give the benefit of the doubt.
I am 44 and have had CP my whole life. I've been married, divorced, married again, and have 4 kids. I've been employed for 15 years as a Systems Analyst plus I've been a radio DJ, a Walmart associate, and even had a comic book biz. I'm a college graduate. BUT, I know I'm fortunate because, like you, I've seen that stereotypes and prejudices keep too many of our disabled brethren unemployed and/or in institutions. It's a travesty and must be changed.
Like you, I have a wonderful spouse who loves me for who I am, healthy or not. We're a couple of the lucky ones, Virginia. Thanks for writing this post. If you or your great hubby ever want to talk more about whatever, just contact me here or on my blog, www.crazyjester.com/chrisblog.
Take care.
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Permalink Reply by Jada L. on
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Wow thank you for the reply. You are an awesome person. I will check out you blog for sure.
may god always bless you and smile upon you.
Jada
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