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Some of Last Year's GED (General Education Development) Questions & Answers
The following questions were set in last year's GED examination
These are genuine questions and answers ............and they WILL breed.
Q. Name the four
seasons
A. Salt,
pepper, mustard and vinegar
Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be
made safe to drink
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes
large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and
canoeists
Q.
How is dew formed
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them
perspire
Q. What
causes the tides in the oceans
A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon.
All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon,
and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the
fight
Q. What
guarantees may a mortgage company insist on
A. If you are buying a house they will
insist that you are well endowed
Q. In a democratic society, how important are
elections
A. Very
important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an
election
Q. What
are steroids
A.
Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs (Shoot yourself now , there is little
hope)
Q.. What
happens to your body as you age
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get
intercontinental
Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches
puberty
A. He says
goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his
adultery (So
true)
Q. Name a
major disease associated with cigarettes
A. Premature death
Q. What is artificial
insemination
A.
When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow
Q. How can you delay milk turning
sour
A. Keep it in
the cow (Simple, but
brilliant)
Q.
How are the main 20 parts of the body categorised (e.g. The
abdomen)
A. The
body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal
cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs
and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A, E,
I,O,U. (wtf!)
Q. What is the
fibula?
A. A small
lie
Q. What does
'varicose' mean?
A. Nearby
Q. What is the most common form of birth
control
A. Most
people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium
(That would
work)
Q. Give
the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
A. The caesarean section is a district in
Rome
Q. What is a seizure?
A. A Roman
Emperor.
(Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit)
Q. What is
a terminal illness
A. When you are sick at the airport.
(Irrefutable)
Q. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic
feature?
A.
Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like
umbrellas
Q. Use
the word 'judicious' in a sentence to show you understand its
meaning
A. Hands
that judicious can be soft as your face.
(OMG)
Q. What does the word 'benign'
mean?
A. Benign is
what you will be after you be eight (brilliant)
Q. What is a turbine?
A. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on
his head.
Tags: last year's GED examination
Views: 15
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Justen on -
Hahaha nice :) I took the early graduation test in CA when I was 16, which I gather is similar to the GED, and was shocked at how little they expect people to know by the time they graduate high school. It wasn't quite *that* bad though :)
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Permalink Reply by Brad Tomlinson on -
I teach GED classes in Virginia, and except for some questions on the math test and the essay question on the writing test, all the questions on the GED tests are multiple choice questions. Thus there would be no answers on the GED tests like the answers you have above. That does not mean some questions would not be answered the way you have them if there were questions on the GED tests in that format. There are lots of people, whether they have their GED or not or whether they had a high school diploma or college degree, who would answer the questions the way you have them above. Jay Leno's Jaywalker routine demonstrates that there are a lot of people who would answer questions that way. It really puts our education system in a poor light, and it makes me wonder about our nation's future if so many people are so poorly educated. That is one of the reasons I teach GED classes, to further educate people. It makes me feel I am making a difference.
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Permalink Reply by JT on -
I always thought that there would be a different GED test for each State. Maybe Virginia only has multiple choice questions but other states differentiate from this style.
I would guess that a multiple choice venue would be the easiest way to go for a student to be able to receive a passing grade.
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